50 Office-Speak Phrases You Love To Hate

(From BBC News) Management speak – don’t you just hate it? Here, we list some of the best worst examples.

 

1. “When I worked for Verizon, I found the phrase going forward to be more sinister than annoying. When used by my boss – sorry, “team leader” – it was understood to mean that the topic of conversation was at an end and not be discussed again.”
Nima Nassefat, Vancouver, Canada

 

2. “My employers recently informed staff that we are no longer allowed to use the phrase brain storm because it might have negative connotations associated with fits. We must now take idea showers. I think that says it all really.”
Anonymous, England

 

3. At my old company, anyone involved with a particular product was encouraged to be a product evangelist. And software users these days, so we hear, want to be platform atheists so that their computers will run programs from any manufacturer.”
Philip Lattimore, Thailand

 

4. ” Incentivise is the one that does it for me.”
Karl Thomas, Perth, Scotland

 

5. “My favorite which I hear from the managers at the bank I work for is let’s touch base about that offline. I think it means have a private chat but I am still not sure.”
Gemma, Wolverhampton, England

 

6. “Have you ever heard the term loop back which means go back to an associate and deal with them?”
Scott Reed, Lakeland, Florida, US

 

7-8. “We used to collect the jargon used in a list and award the person with the most at the end of the year. The winner was a client manager with the classic you can’t turn a tanker around with a speed boat change. What? Second was we need a holistic, cradle-to-grave approach, whatever that is.”
Turner, Manchester

 

9. “Until recently I had to suffer working for a manager who used phrases such as the idiotic I’ve got you in my radar in her speech, letters and e-mails. Once, when I mentioned problems with the phone system, she screamed ‘NO! You don’t have problems, you have challenges’. At which point I almost lost the will to live.”
Stephen Gradwick, Liverpool

 

10. “You can add challenge to the list. Problems are no longer considered problems, they have morphed into challenges.”
Irene MacIntyre, Courtenay, B

 

To see the entire list, please click here.

 

Band Releases Single on Chocolate Discs

The band InnerPartySystem is releasing their next single on 100 pieces of chocolate. The chocolate discs contain vinyl-style grooves, which a spokeswoman for the band says will play on a standard vinyl turntable. The 100-copy limited edition 7″ chocolate single for “Don’t Stop,” will be available only in the UK.

 

Mechanicrawl in San Francisco

You don’t have to trek out to the dusty hell of Burning Man in order to see inspired feats of mechanical art and engineering. In fact, the back rooms and museums of your hometown may conceal feats of industrial genius that would put any steampunk artist to shame.

Take San Francisco’s Fisherman’s Wharf. Tourists know it for picturesque views of the bay, vendors selling clam chowder in bread bowls and bad street-corner buskers. But tucked into the corners of the San Francisco waterfront are such marvels as the most advanced mechanical computer ever made, prototypes of a gigantic clock intended to run for 10,000 years and a working steam engine three stories tall.

“It just occurred to me — the most mechanical geek I know — that if I didn’t put these things together, the rest of San Francisco didn’t either,” says Alexander Rose, one of the organizers of a one-day, self-guided tour of San Francisco’s mechanical marvels.

The tour, dubbed Mechanicrawl and sponsored by the Long Now Foundation, where Rose works, will take place on July 12. Wired.com got an early preview of some of the day’s attractions, which include special access to exhibits at the Exploratorium, the Long Now Foundation’s offices, a World War II submarine and Liberty ship, and the Musée Mécanique. (Wired.com)

Band ID Book

From the Rolling Stones’ tongue-and-lips trademark to the Grateful Dead’s lightning bolt skull to Prince’s glyph, logos embody an identity and experience shared between musicians and their fans, who proudly display these graphics on T-shirts, posters, pins, stickers—even tattoos. Collecting more than 1,000 rock, hip hop, metal, pop, reggae, and country music logos from the 1960s to today, this catchy design survey captures the coolest and most powerful examples of music made visual. Including interviews with key logo artists and presenting the graphics large and over extended gatefolds, BAND ID will wow music fans and designers alike.

The book by Bodhi Oser and Art Chantry can be ordered here.

What Is Chumby?

It’s an alarm clock, a weather guide, a music player, a web device and a video screen… its Chumby.

 

If you’re not familiar with the Chumby, it’s a Linux-based gadget that connects up to the internet via WiFi, and sports a squeeze sensor, accelerometer, and a 3.5″ LCD color touch screen. The coolest part about it is that it runs Adobe Flash-based widgets so pretty much anything you can imagine is (or will be) available for it, and Chumby includes an extensive list at Chumby.com. This whole package comes wrapped up in a nice leather casing, and is actually quite fun to squeeze.

 

Here are the full specs of the Chumby:

3.5″ LCD color touch screen
iPod support
Two external USB 2.0 full-speed ports
350MHz ARM processor
64MB SDRAM
64MB NAND flash ROM
Stereo 2W speakers
Headphone output
Squeeze sensor
Accelerometer (motion sensor)
Leather casing
AC adapter included
Wi-fi connectivity
Access to the free Chumby Network
Over-the-air software updates

The Chumby ships in a bag, and in that bag is another bag and some charms for personalizing your Chumby. There’s also a great Get Connected guide that walks you through getting started. It’s actually one of the simplest devices I’ve used as far as getting it up and running. You literally plug it in, take the Chumby tour, calibrate the touch screen, and get connected. Then there are a couple of additional steps, which the guide details, involving setting the time zone, activating the Chumby, and grabbing an update, if available.

The Chumby can be ordered here for $179.95.

 

Entertainment Weekly Ranks The Top 25 “New” Movie Classics

 

Which films released in the past 25 years stand with the all-time greats?  Here’s the best of the best — see why ”Shrek,” ”Rushmore,” and ”Titanic” made the cut — and see the No. 1 New Classic.  You can read more here.

Puzzle Farter

If you are bored and need a laugh, I suggest you click here and play the next internet sensation, Puzzle Farter.  My only question, why did it take so long…

New TBS Match Game Pilot With Sarah Silverman

Sarah Silverman is set to be a part of the celebrity panel in the pilot for TBS’ Match Game update. Joining the comedian: Norm MacDonald, Super Dave Osborne, Rashida Jones (The Office), Scott Thompson (Kids in the Hall), Niecy Nash (Reno 911!), and host Andrew Daly (Semi-Pro). Robert Smigel (Saturday Night Live, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog) is exec producing. If it gets picked up, Match Game will be TBS’ first game show.

Previous incarnations of Match Game ran almost continuously from 1962 to 1999, turning the likes of Gene Rayburn, Brett Somers, Charles Nelson Reilly, Richard Dawson, and Nipsey Russell into sort of lowbrow television icons along the way. Reruns continue to air on GSN. (The Hollywood Reporter)

Stephen King Promotes Andre Dubus III’s ”The Garden of Last Days”

By Stephen King:  Although at bottom mysterious — like so much of human behavior, especially in tidal matters of the pop cult — it seems to me that good buzz is, like Gaul, divided into three parts. I’ll deal with them by talking about the best book I read this winter, which is almost certainly going to become the book everyone is reading and talking about this summer. And just by saying that, I have become, voilà, part of a genuine good buzz. The book is The Garden of Last Days by Andre Dubus III, due to be published in June. Much more of this later. I can’t wait to talk about it, which is also a reliable signifier of good buzz…

Read more here.  Order the book here.

 

Stephen King’s & Joe Hill’s “Road Rage: Throttle” On Audio

From Joe Hill:  “Throttle,” a story I wrote with my Pop, will be appearing in an upcoming Richard Matheson tribute, HE IS LEGEND. Unfortunately, LEGEND has a relatively small print run, and is a bit pricey for most folks (at least for the time being – stay tuned, there may be a mass market edition). I mentioned a while back that we were working on a plan to get “Throttle” out to a wider audience. This will be it.

“Throttle” and Richard Matheson’s “Duel” – the story that provided the inspiration for “Throttle” – are due out on audio, courtesy of HarperAudio. The two stories, packaged together as ROAD RAGE, should be available on CD and for download, at roughly the same time HE IS LEGEND ships. No word yet on the narrator.

(What I like best about “Throttle” and “Duel” on audio is it means most people will wind up experiencing these stories for the first time while they’re in the car, driving to work. Which just kind of feels right.)

The ROAD RAGE CD can be preordered here.

Eddie Izzard- Death Star Canteen

Some raw language but very funny…

The Great NERF Office War

The Full “Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor” Trailer

Here is the full new trailer for Universal’s The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, coming to theaters on August 1. Directed by Rob Cohen, the anticipated film stars Brendan Fraser, Jet Li, Maria Bello, John Hannah, Michelle Yeoh, Anthony Wong, Luke Ford and Isabella Leong.The blockbuster global “Mummy” franchise takes a spellbinding turn as the action shifts to Asia for the next chapter in the adventure series. Fraser returns as explorer Rick O’Connell to combat the resurrected Han Emperor (Li) in an epic that races from the catacombs of ancient China to the neon-lit streets of post-war Shanghai and high into the spectacular Himalayas. Rick is joined in this all-new adventure by son Alex (Ford), wife Evelyn (Bello) and her brother, Jonathan (Hannah). And this time, the O’Connells must stop a mummy awoken from a 2,000-year-old curse who threatens to plunge the world into his merciless, unending service.

 

What’s On Jonathan Coulton’s iPod

From Jonathan Coulton: For those of you who are wondering what’s on my iPod, I’m the subject of today’s Random Rules in the Onion AV club. I like this interview format very much: I put my iPod on shuffle and we talk about what happens. It’s kind of terrifying because I’ve always felt a little self-conscious about sharing my taste in music, ever since 1982 when a neighbor kid asked me what bands I liked and I panicked and said “Um, Air Supply?” Fortunately nothing really embarrassing came up. Though I fear that I may have said too much about Billy Joel and Paul McCartney and how they’re not as good as they used to be – what if I meet them in person and they hate me because they read this interview?

You can read what songs are on Jonathan Coulton’s iPod here.

 

2008 Comic-Con Studio Panels Sneak Peek

Its nearly that time again with over 125,000 people filling San Diego’s massive 49 sq. km convention center to capacity for the annual pop culture event that has become Comic Con.

As usual the movie studios and a roster of celebs will be there in force for some big presentations of their upcoming genre product.

The studios have big plans this year with eight different presentations taking place. More details will be on hand when the official guide comes out, but for now this is the rundown of what’s likely to be screened at the four-day con which runs from July 23rd-27th 2008. Be sure to check their site for more about the webmaster panel and party in coming days:

20th Century Fox
Footage and presentations for “City of Ember”, “Mirrors” and “The Day the Earth Stood Still”. Keanu Reeves, Jennifer Connelly, Kiefer Sutherland, Amy Smart and Alexandre Aja rumored to attend.

Lionsgate
A large presentation for Frank Miller’s “The Spirit” with Miller, Jaime King, Eva Mendes, Gabriel Macht and Samuel L. Jackson all rumored to be attending. Some “Punisher: War Zone” footage may also be screened.

Paramount Pictures
There’ll be a full screening of “Tropic Thunder”

Sony Pictures
Horror flicks “Quarantine” and “Underworld: Rise of the Lycans” with the likes of Rhona Mitra, Bill Nighy, Michael Sheen, Jennifer Carpenter, Chris Brown and Jay Hernandez rumored. There’s also been rumors of something for “Quantum of Solace” (footage likely, slim chance of but a possible Daniel Craig appearance rumored).

Summit Entertainment
A large presentation for “Twilight” with Catherine Hardwicke, Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Cam Gigandet, Rachelle LaFevre, Edi Gathegi, Taylor Lautner and author Stephenie Meyer confirmed.

Universal Pictures
Jason Statham, Paul W.S. Anderson, Rob Cohen, Brendan Fraser, Danny McBride, Will Ferrell all rumored to appear for presentations of “Death Race,” “Land of the Lost” and “The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor”.

Warner Bros. Pictures
Zack Snyder and the cast of “Watchmen” looks to be the big panel of the entire con. Christian Bale and Jared Padalecki are also tipped to attend. Footage from the likes of “RocknRolla,” “Ninja Assassin,” “Star Wars: The Clone Wars”, “Terminator Salvation: The Future Begins” and “Friday the 13th” could be screened.

The Weinstein Company
A panel for Kevin Smith’s “Zack and Miri Make a Porno” with Smith, Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks. Kyle Newman’s “Fanboys” will likely be screened in full during the Con.